Educate by Example

Shavua Tov. Rav Elazar Abuchatzeira זצ״ל asked an interesting question regarding today’s Parsha. We learn that the בן סורר ומורה, the thirteen year old rebellious son, is put to death at his young age. It is better that he die with minimal sins rather than wait until he’s older and commits much worse sins. Yet, when Yishmael was a young boy and dying of thirst, he was saved. The angels asked Hashem why he should be saved, when in the future his children would cause terrible grief to the Jewish people. Hashem answered with באשר הוא שם, that right now he hasn’t sinned. What is the difference between the two? Rav Elazar answered that the difference was in their חינוך, education. Yishmael had Avraham Avinu as his teacher, and there was always hope that he would act as his father taught him. The בן סורר ומורה became that way because his parents set a bad example. Based on his behavior as a youth, there was no chance he would change his ways. We see the importance of real חינוך. The greatest education parents can give their children, is by the example they set. No such thing as “Do as I say, but do not do as I do.” Such an attitude, can bring catastrophic results.