Every Child is Unique

Yakov made a point of telling his sons that it was important that they remain united and that there be Shalom between them. This way his blessings would have a proper vessel for them to be received.

Rabbi Twerski points out that Yakov Avinu was teaching a valuable lesson in parenting when he gave the blessings.

Basically, he realized that each of his sons was different and they had their own special talents. He was encouraging them to reach their own individual potential. True blessing comes when a person is able to become everything he can be.

Parents make a big mistake when they “decide” what their children should be. The important factor is that the children need to be encouraged to do what makes “them” happy and fulfilled.

This is especially harmful when parents try to manipulate their children when they tell them that they are only telling them what to do, because they love them.

My brother told me a story of a friend who bemoaned the fact that his son had become Chareidi. My brother told the friend that he should feel good that his son had the self confidence to express himself in a way that he would feel fulfilled.

This was the message that Yakov gave to his sons.