Tisha B’Av and Rebuke

Parshat Devarim is always read before Tisha B’Av. One of the reasons is that the word, “איכה” is found in the beginning of the Parsha. This is the same word as the name of the Book of Lamentations, which is read on Tisha B’Av.

But there is another connection that might even be more significant. This has to do with the fact that Parshat Devarim is mainly one of תוכחה, rebuke.

Moshe Rabbeinu makes his final address to the Jewish people before his death. It is filled with rebuke for all of the times that the people turned away from Hashem, during their forty years in the desert.

It is also a warning as to what will happen if they do turn away from the Torah.

The Rabbis teach that giving rebuke is very difficult to do, but it is particularly effective before one dies.

Pirkei Avot tells us that one of the ways of acquiring the Torah is to love rebuke. The Book of Mishlei said it best. “Rebuke a wise man and gain a friend. Rebuke a fool, and you gain an enemy.”

It would be nice if we would only be complimented and flattered all of the time. But that is not the way for us to improve ourselves. We all have room for improvement and it should be a priority that we try to grow spiritually.

Added to this, rebuke has a therapeutic aspect. We are urged not hold things in, when we are wronged by another individual. It is our duty to let them know if they have harmed us physically or monetarily, or shamed us. This gives the other party the chance to make things right, and it is a great relief to get things off our chest.

Tisha B’Av is meant to be a day of reflection, where we must learn from past mistakes. This is how we will succeed in turning Tisha B’Av from a day of mourning, to a day of joy.